clintswan | WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't
you people see the plain truth in front of your face?
The chicken was going to
the "other side." That's what "they" call it the
"other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay.
And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too.

I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out
this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes
with seemingly harmless phrase like "the other side."
That chicken should not be free to cross the road.
It's as plain and simple as that.

DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to
cross roads without having their motives called into
question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the
road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the
road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were
quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on
it.

RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many
more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the
chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying
sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not
only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your
important documents, and balance your checkbook and
Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road
move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do
you mean by chicken"? Could you define "chicken"
please?

GEORGE W. BUSH
I don't think I should have to answer that question.

LOUIS FARRAKHAN
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The
chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample
him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto
the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the
chicken crossed the road, And there was much
rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

penguininbondge.livejournal.com

Arther Anderson Consultant
Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework.

Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes.

The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.